Ch-ch-ch-changes

Ah! I've finally personalized the layout of the blog; straight away from those pre-made ones and all of their preservatives (I kid, it's all good work). Here's a quick rundown of what I did:

• I've finally settled with the black-and-white colour scheme. I'm a minimalist, so I feel right at home! I did keep the green, though; it's my favorite colour. Besides, it matches the name!
• I made the banner and tabs myself! (Yes, that is my writing. Far from calligraphy, but enough to look good!)
• Jacked some photos from Facebook to make that 'reel' of photos, so to say. Thank you, Illustrator, for your 'trace' function!
• I've allowed a space for my tweets, which I'm a little new at. I get the gist of it though :S
• I like to share quotes. There's an app - er, gadget - for that!
• I still use the 'Simple' theme as a template, though.

Overall, I'm happy with it. I wanted to avoid anything flashy like a Vegas show. I hope you all are as well! Besides, my sister and I have a competition about having the best looking blog - and this one's a keeper! (It's funny - we've been secretly building our blogs like a weapons race between Kennedy and Khrushchev)

On another note, in a step to be very open to my readers, this is my schedule for my senior year!

• Theatre Arts 30 and 35 IB (Epicness right here!)
• Biology 30 (I love this subject)
• Chemistry 30 (I LOVE this subject)
• Physics 30 (Meh. It's alright - though I have a very dry teacher for this one)
• Social Studies 30-1 (One of my best, though I had to go down from SS IB to make room for Theatre)
• English 30-1 (Meh. Not too excited about this one, either)
• Religion 35 (Mandatory course in order to graduate, but I'm doing an independent online program for this)

A glance at it does make it seem like I'm giving myself a rather large workload. I feel I can handle it, though. I mean, if I wasn't confident in what I could do, my schedule would be drastically different! To me, it seems fine. I've got enough classes to keep many options open, while I still have my full Theatre Arts course squeezed in there! It's enough to map out a path for me that can be challenging, exciting and personal.

But the same can't be said for others, though...


There's a lot of kids who are dropping some pretty important classes in my grade - and I mean these are some HEFTY classes. I mean, I shouldn't be judging, but when I asked some of them why they were dropping courses, they said that they simply didn't want to take it.

A bit of a weak excuse, if you ask me.

The thing that troubles me, however, is that they may not be thinking ahead, you know? I'll say it over and over again: keep your options open! Most of us are never sure on our future unless we've already mapped it out to a T. Don't cut yourself off from the future full of choices that you deserve! Especially at this point, when you're in your last year of school. Hard work done now is less work for you in the future!

It's important to know that ambitions change like the wind.

The Mold

So I stumbled upon this meme known as an "Influence Map" here and I was very interested in how it worked. Basically, it's a grid where you fill in the squares with individuals or things that have influenced you. The more squares per image, the larger the influence. I decided to jump on the bandwagon and create an influence map of my own. This particular map highlights the individuals who contributed to both my artistic side and the way I identify my personal morals and ideals. I'm not saying I'm a complex guy, but these people have given me depth and a new insight into myself.

And here's my explanation for each of my influences (from left to right, going down):

--------------------------

Meryl Streep: The one who I believe to be the queen of the silver screen. Her professional skill amazes me, and such perfection is something I wish to achieve in the art of drama.

Nelson Mandela: Madiba himself is a man who many admire. After reading books about him (and by him), I find that his strong yet graceful way of treating others is worthy of replication in my life.

Jonathan Larson: His creations (specifically, Rent) are the reasons why I truly began to immerse myself in dramatic arts.

Romeo Dallaire: A Canadian hero, this man's own courageous experiences in the face of terror during the Rwandan Genocide earned my respect - and his intention to never give up is truly admirable.

George Harrison: My totally hippy and spiritual side grew from his songs. My favorite Beatle.

Aung San Suu Kyi: Major idol #1. Fighting repression with peace and solidarity is something we don't see much of nowadays, and Daw Suu Kyi has been doing that for years. To me, she symbolizes strength, honor and integrity - characteristics that I wish to work on. Her intelligence concerning domestic and foreign issues is also very deep. Oh, and I'm a sucker for women with fresh flowers in their hair.

Kristin Chenoweth: Jonathan Larson immersed me in drama, Cheno kept me in it. Talent at this scale is hard to come by, and her humor is simply adorable! She takes her performances to incredible heights, and that power is enviable. In addition, we share a very liberal view concerning individual rights.

Eric Clapton: My biggest musical influence. Many of the music I listen to stems from my fascination with the man whom many have called "God."

Matt Doyle: I've only found out about him recently but during the time that I have known about him, I have evolved in leaps and bounds. His own personal story motivates me to go forward - to do what I love. Of course, his success is evident in his position now.

Gary Oldman: My personal silver screen icon. Gary Oldman is the quintessential "actor's actor." He has had such a storied career, yet he remains a humble and honest individual - a truly difficult thing to do when one is so successful. I only wish to be like him someday.

Jaime Escalante: Better known to many as the inspiration to the movie Stand and Deliver, Jaime Escalante inspired me to never give up on those who may need me and to help everyone - especially those who other individuals would not approach - and treat them with the same courtesy and friendship as anyone else.

Sir Ian McKellan: Larson immersed me in drama. Cheno kept me in drama. Sir Ian inspires me to excel in drama. A man of such caliber is truly awe-inspiring, and his performances are nothing to scoff at.

Stevie Nicks: All of her music - from Fleetwood Mac to now - is nothing short of eerily awesome. Heck, her music may have even saved me in one point in time. Simply put, she mystifies me. Oh, and she's not bad looking for someone her age ;)

Gordon Ramsay: Wait, WHAT? But seriously, the man exudes perfection when it comes to culinary skill (another personal love of mine). I am a very precise and perfective individual, and 'the devil of the kitchen' himself displays this with finesse. Mind you, his mouth is not necessarily something to be mirroring in life!

Maria Muszynski: If you have not done so yet, read here, and that will explain everything!

-------------------------

Human nature dictates that we are blank slates to begin with, and we require the influence of our surroundings to mold who we become. When we grow older, I feel that it is very important to recognize who influenced you the most in order to have a sense of 'self-discovery.' If you were confused about yourself, then doing this will really help you out. You will learn more about yourself, and that personal insight is a strength that not many people have (especially at a young age).

Know your influences. Know who you are.

Fork in the Road

Hmmm... I'm in a bit of a rut.

For the past few years, I've been parading around the idea that I would like to become some kind of doctor in the future - an oncologist, to be exact. In fact, most of my efforts as of late have been pointing in that direction. I've taken a full science workload for my senior year. I tried going for a medical research internship at a local hospital (which I didn't get! Darn!). I've even began 'indulging' myself with medical information that anyone would consider useless for a seventeen year old. That's how hard I believed in that dream. But now, I find that dream is fading in place of a new one...

Theatre 

Quite a jump from medicine, I must say!

My fascination with theatre comes from one of the few times that I believe that fate may have intervened. You see, when I had started grade 10, I needed an extra class to fit my schedule. Sports Med was placed there, by default, and I had absolutely no intention of doing that. So I went to our councilor to have my schedule shifted. He told me that there weren't many classes yet (as a grade 10 student, we were last to be seen by them), and that only a flurry of optional classes were left. He went through the list: sports med, law, computer tech, cosmetology, wood shop, home economics and some other scattered subjects. However, he did point out drama class as an option.

Before this, I took drama once in junior high. Let me tell you if you have never experienced it: junior high drama is a bit of a joke - literally. It was mainly a combination of common games and 'artistic' projects that do not really delve into the heart and soul of theatre. So, to say the least, I was disappointed with my past experience and choosing drama class at this state would seem to be counter-intuitive, I thought. For some reason, however, I thought, "What the hell. I'll just do it. Won't be too difficult." That - and the fact that the councilor sort of insisted on me joining the drama curriculum to make new friends (I was a new student from another school and I knew no one in the school). I said yes, of course. That tends to be a weakness of mine - saying 'yes' to everything and everyone. I'm a slave to acceptance, I guess.

He was right. He was damn right! Within days of beginning class, I could count my friends with two hands - haha, I know, not a lot, but it was fine enough for me at the time! - and within a few weeks, I was practically at a social level with everyone there! I've come to think that this came to be because the environment in the class was radically different from any other. I mean, everyone is way more relaxed and open in it. The Cool Guy/Hot Girl ideology did not exist here! I really noticed this when monologues had to be presented in front of the class. Normally, I'm not too comfortable presenting myself in front of what I perceive as a judgemental and narrow-minded age group, but I did not have that sensation with these people. I was confident in my work. I was energetic. I was ready. I was practically on top of the world, and that made for a better performance that day.

Even then, the class itself was nothing compared to a full production. The excitement of a play was simply... euphoric, to say the least! According to our drama teacher, the completion of a play was like "giving birth: you are practically preparing ahead of time, eventually encountering a lot of pain and tiredness, but producing a wonderful thing." I do not know what its like to give birth. I don't imagine many men do, either. Nevertheless, I understood what she was talking about, as the process was one of the few actual "emotional roller coasters" in a generic high school lifestyle.

At the beginning we're all ridiculously excited and practically talk about the play whenever we have the opportunity to do so.

As we progress through it, things slow down and the following probably occur:

• someone quits (Lesson: Save us the trouble of finding a replacement; we're not going to beg you to stay!)
• some people lose interest and refuse to rehearse lines until the last minute (Lesson: You want a part, work for it!)
• someone gets overly emotional about the stresses in their lives, blaming it on school or work or some other institution (Lesson: High school's a buffet - don't eat up more than you can fit on your plate!)
• someone gets power hungry and turns into a thespi-devil hybrid (Lesson: There's no "I" in "cast", but there is a "U" in "douche!")
• someone surprises you and the rest of the cast and crew by performing like there was no tomorrow (Lesson: Never underestimate any actor - find out their strengths and play to it!)

All of that "drama inner-drama" practically culminates into the show itself -  a finished piece for everyone to experience. Now, the whole deal is just awesome! I made many more friends through this experience this year, as I was a part of two high school productions. That alone would be enough for anyone to keep going.

With such a long break from that as of late, I've been really wanting to experience this again. I overlooked its importance and significance in my life, and it could be a calling.

Do I want to hop on the rollercoaster for that rush once again? Yes.

Do I want to stay on the rollercoaster?
Time will tell.


It was all a high...


.... and I loved it.

1 + 1 = Window

I've really been yearning to get back into the art business as of late. I haven't actually done a complete piece for over a year (school, theatre, laziness, etc.) and maybe I should sharpen up those skills again. The only thing was that I did not know what to create... until I saw this:

Lie to Me (Tim Roth) by Camilla Malcus

... Now I'm all about watercolours, though I have never actually used them for a full piece! Camilla's stuff is insane, and her portraits are a thing of envy. Fortunately, she created a tutorial displaying her method of painting, and it seems very easy to me! I just need to get some more supplies, then I'll be all set to start.

If you want to see some of Camilla's awesome work, visit her at MicuDesign. You might need to translate the page, though. That's what Google's for!

I really want to get into creating portraits again. Frankly, I'm bored of doing the ever-so-common landscape and I practically avoided portraits because I was afraid to make them.

Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

If I want to be a better artist, this a step forward. Of course, I'll probably be working on digital art when the school year begins (as I often create posters and ads for the drama department or for anyone who asks), so I'll get my fill of art, but I need hard copies!

Funny thing is... I don't really look like an "artist," per se. I'm large in stature. I dress like a preppy tool. I have poor posture. Etc, etc etc. People's first impression of me is not necessarily "Oh! Look! I bet he's an artist!" But I guess we come in all shapes and sizes. It's all about the talent, though, and I never actually realized what an artist I was until junior high. Of course, as a little kid, I took art because "I liked it" but never for the fact that I could do it well. That's when my teacher, Maria Muszynski, came in.

Ms. Muszynski was all that and a bag of chips (or, in her case, a bag of a crazy, cultural, cool-hippie chips)! Before I even went to the school, I already heard so much about her. When I did get a chance to be in her class, it was one of the most eye-opening experiences I ever had. Ms. M was loud, funny, easy-going, articulate, knowledgeable, creative, artistic, larger-than-life and so much more. Most importantly, she knew how to identify your strengths and help you make that part of yourself grow. She helped me find the artist within myself simply by praising skill, rather than the actual piece of work itself. I clearly remember a charcoal piece that I created of a wolf. Now, I'd never used charcoal before (and I probably never will) but the piece came together - sort of. I found myself unable to produce depth because I kept smudging the charcoal in light areas, which made compensate by darkening the whole piece altogether. And this cycle repeated. And repeated. And repeated. Ms. M always walked by and looked at everyone's pieces before working on her own and when she reached me, she saw what I was doing, laughed (in a good way) and told me to let the medium do the work - and by medium she meant the charcoal, not my wrist smudging the damn thing. When I finally finished the piece, both of us knew that there were some things that needed to be worked on in the future (specifically, on eye was smaller and crooked). Ms. M, unlike any teacher I had, didn't tell me this with cupcakes and sprinkles, she just told me what to work on next time. No, not how to make an eye, but she told me to control the medium, not the other way around. But she did praise the skill I had at that age, and the fact that I would get messy to make a good piece of work.

I'm competitive by nature, so such comments made me want to work harder - and work harder, I did. As I refined and polished my techniques, an appreciation of art in a new way grew on me. I began to love art as much as Ms. M. So I took more pride in my work, and each one was better than before. Later that year, I found out that an art piece of mine was sent to the District headquarters and was used in a gallery of other student's work for the year. To my surprise, Ms. M sent in the charcoal drawing of the wolf. The same one that I struggled and loathed for the longest time. No matter how much I disliked it, I was ecstatic to know that it was being recognized in such a way. It was the first time my art was displayed like that. I never realized until recently that the piece was the cornerstone of my evolution into an artist or different media. It showed the fundamental aspects of a great piece: passion, technique, and good ol' blood, sweat and tears.

A few years after that first piece of work, I could not find Ms. M anywhere! After some searching and gossip, I found out that she was very sick with a tumour. After the initial shock, I resolved to work as hard as she did. Even with such a disease, she was still the same Ms. M I had in grade 7. Her progress for the next couple of months astonished me, as she looked strong, vibrant, and passionate about her work. She's back working full time now, and she still loves what she does.

So when I look back, I know that Ms. M's comments and critiques challenged me to become better, and she always played that side of the coin. She knew I could do it, so she gave me a hand. Truly, if it wasn't for Ms. Muszynski, I would not be an artist, actor, creator, whatever it is I am today. She unlocked that unknown part of myself, and matured the side that always heard "Good job! Excellent work!" She taught me that it was not about the completed work, it was about how the work was completed.

It was a new way of thinking. It was a new way of creating.

Such a simple idea has gone so far for me, and I have her to thank for that. So, to show my appreciation for her, I plan on creating a piece of art just for her this year. I don't know yet if it will be a painting, drawing, movie, etc., but I know it will be for her - to thank her for building me up to what I am now. I will make sure that it is the greatest piece of work I have ever done.

How I'd Fare Out West

So I've finally decided to fall into this blogging business. Personally, I'm fine with it! Contrary to what I blabber out everyday, I enjoy writing - especially in such a liberal way. The one thing that pushed me to this was reading Matt Doyle's blog, and his post about bullying. I strongly suggest that you read it, as it is very powerful. He's got a pretty interesting life story, and its a reason why I'm a great fan of his.

This showed me the medium that is blogging, and how anyone can "achieve expression without repression." I'm mainly beginning this to keep a digital journal of everything I care to write down - and recently, I've been wanting to write ALOT! So I said, "Why not?" and here we are!

School starts in two weeks, but I'll try to keep the posting up.